Modesty culture in the west is fucking bullshit and full of double standards.
“Your skirt is too short.”
“Your top is too low cut.”
“I can see your bra.”
“That’s a bit slutty.”
But a woman walks by them in a bikini and all is fine.
Men want their women (mothers, wives and daughters) to cover up and keep things hidden but then watch porn and drool over Dua Lipa with her breasts peeping out the bottom of her crop top (btw I love Dua and her peeping boobs).
Post yoga and a bit messy but no one bats an eye when I share a photo of myself in a sports bra.
Waking up from a night out and no body gives a shit when I share a picture from bed, with only the duvet for “modesty”.
Sharing a picture post shower when the picture is literally just strategically cropped, not a dicky bird gets said.
Finished swimming and I share a picture of myself in my swimsuit, everyone has words of support.
But share a picture, where I’m wearing a bra that you can see and someone has an opinion.
Someone explain to me what the difference is… and why one is unacceptable.
It’s like when that ANTM contestant refused to wear lingerie for modesty reasons but was fine wearing a bikini. They literally expose the same areas! In some cases bras actually cover more than bikini tops do…
Why is carefully covered nudity and swimwear perfectly fine but lingerie is not?
This bollocks has been drip fed to women for millennia, to the point other women feel the need to make the same comments. To the point other women try control how women dress.
Here’s the problem, modesty culture has nothing to do with how women dress and everything to do with the inability of men to control their sexual impulses. So men don’t wait their women dressing and acting in a certain way because they know from personally experienced the thought processes that go through a het man’s head. Thing is, women know these thoughts too. We have these thoughts, we just know how to control ourselves. (A generalisation I know, #notallmen).
Whether or not a man can control his urges around a woman is not the fault of the woman, what she wears or how she acts, it is souly his responsibility. How someone reacts to anything is their responsibility.
Modesty culture IS rape culture. By telling a woman how to dress so they don’t arouse men who can’t control their own urges you are victim blaming before any assualt takes place. You are already putting the blame on her should she be attacked.
Do you know what the number one cause of rape is? Rapists. That’s it! Rapists are the only reason anyone gets raped. Clothing doesn’t matter.
Case in point, when I was raped at 14 I was wearing a polo neck jumper and jeans, because October is cold. Tell me how that’s immodest, go ahead, I’ll wait.
What causes men to cat call? ‘Cause that happens to women regardless of what they wear. I’m going to take a leap and say the cause of men cat calling is the men who cat call. Quite sure that’s not wrong.
Things don’t happen to women because of what they wear. They happen because people can’t control their actions.
It’s my body and I’ll dress how I damn well please, I will share what I damn well please and you can keep your double standards to yourself.